Mother of 2 Raises Suspicion That Her Children Are Spies

Seattle, WA – Anne Brickleback is troubled that her daughter, age 5, and son, age 4, have been acting strange, for roughly 8 months after the holiday season. The interior and furniture in the house have been subtly changing every morning, which was simply, just an oversight to her.

“I figured it’s nothing,” Anne says. “I clean up after them every day, so it’s not something I really have to think about.”

Anne has been returning pillows, toys, clothes, and even food since they were born, like any parent, would do. But lately, she’s been picking up aluminum foil, assorted fastening hardware, folders containing papers with black highlighted strips, and even MREs (Meals, Ready-to-Eat).

“Ever since the new year, I’ve been hearing a lot of static sounds, kind of like that sound of a tv when there’s no channel. Back and forth, between them talking to each other,” she says. “I also felt as if I was being watched all the time, with a pair of binoculars or something. Lately, they haven’t been responding to me when I say their name. Instead, they wanted me to refer them to a different name.”

The distant chatter from the walkie-talkies, the two agents possessed, caught the attention of Supervisory Special Agent, John Lithium, which prompted him to take immediate action.

“Special Agent Cupcake and Special Agent Batman have been apprehended and we are currently conducting a thorough investigation to find out what they know, how they acquired this equipment, and who they’re working for,” John affirmed. “My agents tell me that they acquired their spy equipment around the 24th of December, and the label on the mysterious box was tagged by a name that goes by the Codename, “Santa.”

At publishing time, an anonymous source has tipped us that the only information Supervisory Special Agent Lithium has obtained, is that the agents’ cat’s breath smells like cat food.